The shape of a best man speech is fairly settled, which makes it a good fit for a template. The highlighted blanks are prompts. Swap them for your own names and stories, then read the whole thing out loud and change any line that doesn't sound like you. The stories are what make a toast worth hearing, so spend most of your time on sections 3 and 4.
If you want to know why each part is there, or when you'll be speaking at the reception, read the best man speech guide. There are also four full best man speech examples in different styles.
1. Thank the hosts and introduce yourself
Half the room won't know who you are. Say your name and how you know the groom. A one-line thank-you to whoever is hosting is a nice touch, but keep it short, as the father of the bride has usually done the formal thanks.
Good evening, everyone. For those who don't know me, I'm [your name], and I've known [groom's name] for [number] years, since [where you met, such as college, work or a team]. Thank you to [hosts' names] for tonight.
2. How you met
Tell the story of meeting him, with one detail that shows what he was like even then.
The first time I met [groom's name], he was [what he was doing]. [the detail that sums him up]. I knew right away that [what you thought of him].
3. A funny story about the groom
Pick a quality people will recognize, and a story that shows it. Give it a place and a detail. Keep it to things he'd laugh at himself, and leave out exes and the details of the bachelor party.
[groom's name] is [a quality, such as very organized or hopeless with directions]. [a funny story that shows it, with a place and a detail].
4. A story that shows his kinder side
Now something sincere. A time he helped you or someone else works well, told plainly.
He's also [a kinder quality, such as loyal or generous]. When [a time you or someone else needed help], he [what he did].
5. His partner and the couple
Say something kind about his partner, by name. Say when you first heard about them and what they're like together.
Then he met [partner's name]. [how they met, or what he said after the first date]. [partner's name], you [something specific you like about them], and the two of you [what they are like together].
6. A word to the groom (optional)
One or two sentences, said plainly.
[groom's name], thank you for [something he has done for you]. I'm proud to be up here for you today.
7. The toast
Ask everyone to raise their glasses, and say both names clearly so the room knows when to drink.
So everyone, please raise your glasses to [partner's name] and [groom's name].
Tips for filling it in
Write more than you need for each blank, then cut. It's easier to trim a good story than to stretch a thin one. Use real names for places, like the diner or the campground, because a named place helps guests picture it. If you're stuck for a story, text his siblings or his old roommates and ask for the one they'd tell.
When it's done, read it out loud with a timer. Three to five minutes is the right length, and anything over six is too long for a reception. Practice it a few times in the week before so you can look up from the page now and then.
Common mistakes with templates
The biggest risk with any template is a speech that sounds like a template. If you fill each blank with a general word like "funny" or "kind," the room will hear a list of compliments with nothing to picture. Put a story in every blank you can, even a short one.
The other common mistake is leaving the partner section until last and rushing it. His partner's family will be listening closely to that part, so give it the same care as the stories about the groom. If you don't know his partner well, ask the groom how they met and what he loves about them, and use his answer.
Finally, check your opening line. Many best men start with a joke about being nervous or about the groom's advice for the speech. That's fine, but keep it to a sentence or two and get to your first story quickly.
The template filled in
Here is the template completed by Ty, who is best man for his friend Brandon. They met working summers at a canoe rental on the Harpeth River outside Nashville, Tennessee. Brandon is an HVAC technician, and he's marrying Carly, who manages a coffee shop in East Nashville. Carly's parents are hosting the reception.
Good evening, everyone. For those who don't know me, I'm Ty, and I've known Brandon for twelve years, since we both worked summers at a canoe rental on the Harpeth River. Thank you to Carly's parents, Tammy and Doug, for tonight, and for the best barbecue I've had at a wedding.
The first time I met Brandon, he was flipping a canoe over his head on his own, which is not how you're supposed to do it. Our manager told him to wait for help. He said he was fine and walked it straight into the side of the shed. He didn't drop it, though. I knew right away he was stubborn, and that I wanted him on my side.
Brandon is the handiest man I know and the worst at asking for directions. He can fix any air conditioner in Middle Tennessee, but last fall he drove us to a Titans game and took the wrong exit three times, because he said he didn't need the GPS. We got to our seats at the start of the second quarter. He still says the traffic was the problem.
He's also the most generous friend I have. Two summers ago, in the middle of a heat wave, my grandma's air conditioning went out. Brandon drove over after a ten-hour shift, fixed it in the dark with a flashlight in his teeth and wouldn't let her pay him. She's here tonight, and she's told me twice already that she'd like to dance with him.
Then he met Carly. He went into her coffee shop to fix the ice machine, and he came back three days in a row to "check on it." Carly, you're the only person who's ever got Brandon to admit he was lost. You're patient with him, and the two of you laugh at each other more than any couple I know.
Brandon, thank you for showing up every time I've needed you. I'm proud to be up here for you today.
So everyone, please raise your glasses to Carly and Brandon.
Ty filled in every blank with something specific, like the canoe hitting the shed and the flashlight in his teeth. The funny story and the kind story are both about Brandon's job, which ties the speech together, and the line about Carly getting him to admit he was lost brings back the Titans game. If you'd like to see other styles, read the best man speech examples, and if you're giving your toast alongside the maid of honor, the maid of honor speech guide shows what she'll cover.
Common questions
Do I have to use every section of the template?
No. Leave out anything that doesn't apply. The introduction, the stories, the kind words about the couple and the toast are the parts to keep. The thank-you at the start and the word to the groom at the end are optional.
How long will the speech be if I fill in the template?
If you write two or three sentences for each gap and tell two short stories, it usually comes out at three to four minutes. Read it aloud and time it before the wedding.
Can I change the order?
Yes, as long as the toast comes last. Some best men put the story of how the couple met before the stories about the groom. Do whatever makes the stories flow best.
Will the template work for a best woman, or for two grooms?
Yes. A best woman can use it exactly as it is. For a wedding with two grooms, use your friend's husband's name in the couple section and both names in the toast.